Self-love is rarely linked to success or achievement in one’s life goals. Unfortunately, self-love wasn’t taught to us when we were being taught how life goals should be achieved.
My first thoughts about success were to stay up until midnight, work hard and get as much sleep as possible. This is a wrong way of thinking about sustainability.
I was unhappy, stressed and burned out from this path. I also felt less inclined to stress other people because I believed I could do it all myself. It also cost me my relationship with family and friends, and my health. It was not what I wanted.
I didn’t realize the power behind cultivating self-love for the genuine success I was craving. My lack of self-love led me to chase my goals in fear of losing them. I was unable to love myself and I became dependent on my accomplishments.
Your inner voice can help you feel self-love. In every aspect of your daily life, your inner voice can either encourage or judge you. You can find your inner cheerleader and your most destructive enemy. Many people don’t take the time to hear and listen to their inner voices. This can lead them into a rut in their behavior, their treatment of others, and their own self-esteem.
More often than not, most people’s inner voice is not very nice at all. If you don’t consciously cultivate a healthy inner voice that ultimately contributes to your self-love, it won’t be expressed in your life.
Here’s the truth: How can you enjoy your success, happiness, and relationships if you constantly beat yourself up inside or feel like you are not worthy of them?
So many people try to go out and conquer their world for material success but haven’t even conquered themselves yet. This sort of success can be short-term and exhausting.
Your inner voice can sometimes become a number to you over time, just as my own. My inner voice – which was very condemning and overly critical – was so normal that I almost became unconscious of it. Yet, unbeknownst to me, it was affecting my future success, behaviors, and how I treated myself, how I treated others, but I didn’t even know it.
The inner voice of the mind is what we judge, and it’s commonly known as self-esteem. And as most of us know, self-esteem – confidence in one’s abilities and respect for yourself – plays a massive role in one’s success, happiness, and fulfillment. Without confidence, we stay stagnant, and growth isn’t possible.
“Love yourself unconditionally, just as you love those closest to you despite their faults.” — Les Brown
What does it mean to be self-loved?
Your self-love is a reflection of the way you love yourself. In fact, that’s precisely what it is. Self-love is a reflection of how you love those close to you at work, in your relationships and with friends.
To marginalize oneself, it will also marginalize those around you. If you don’t think you can do something or accomplish a task, you unconsciously won’t trust others to get it done either.
If you don’t have the patience or condemn yourself when you feel like you did something wrong, this behavior will be reflected in how you treat your coworkers or your significant other. You will be less forgiving when they’ve made a mistake. Just as you do for yourself, your close friends and family will be criticized.
This is why? It’s because how we treat ourselves internally is an exact reflection of how we treat others externally.
Most people would say, “well, I don’t need others to succeed.” If you think this is true, just ask any successful person how they became successful, and I am sure they would tell you their success would have been futile if they did not have the cooperation of others around them.
And cooperation, agreement, and trust – how lasting companies and true sustainable success is built – are all derived from the self-love and compassion you’ve cultivated within yourself first.
Your internal feelings about yourself can have a huge impact on how externally you build and destroy things. So, when you want to accelerate your success in life – hitting the gym, eating right, and reading self-blogs are great – but don’t forget about cultivating more compassion, self-love, and patience for yourself.
If you don’t, your life can feel like you’re taking 1 step forward in material success and two steps back in your inner success. Trust me. Inner success is self-love and contentment. It’s what your soul craves. It is how you can enjoy success and live a life that’s worth it.
So, forgive yourself for your mistakes, be patient with your pitfalls, give yourself the self-respect you deserve, and picture yourself as already successful internally – once you’ve practiced this every day, you have found the secret to a sustainable and worthwhile success.
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